I have been married for almost 7 years to the love of my life. Though he and I are both pretty traditional, we decided not to ask my parents to pay for our wedding. Besides, we were both older (31 and 36 respectively) and felt that we should pay for our own wedding. When we first met and went into business together we were broke. I mean, the kind of broke that defies words...should we eat this week or pay to keep the office phone on kind of broke. So, even though we owned 1 taxi company at the time, it was stumbling. It was holding its own but not enough to pay for the wedding of my dreams. Luckily my dreams changed throughout the process. We had the perfect wedding, for US, and I kept the cost down to a little under $2300..for 300 people!
First, the centerpiece in any wedding is the bride. Or should I say the bride's gown? I found the gown I wanted but it was almost $3000. Not going to happen. So, I started looking and ended up at David's Bridal. They were having an awesome sale. Instead of paying $3000 for the wedding dress of my dreams, I changed my dreams a little bit and got an awesome gown for $175. It was just amazing. They have seasonal sales and I was a June bride. So, if you're looking for an amazing gown on the cheap, definitely check them out. My dress looked very similar to the one shown and that is not me.
Another very expensive aspect of getting married is the reception hall. Now, a lot of women want to have their reception at a big fancy hotel. More power to you! For me, I didn't care about where it was as long as I was surrounded by the people I loved and cared about. Corny, yes. Truthful, yes. We called around for prices and the least expensive hotel wanted $2100 for 4 hours. Uh, no thank you. So, I called around and got the Knights of Columbus. We had an unlimited amount of hours there, could decorate it any way we wanted, could accomodate all of our guests, for the low price of...$50. I jumped on it. We were supposed to get married in my husband's parents' gardens but that morning it started to rain (which my Dad assured me was good luck). I was NOT about to go traipsing through a muddy garden with a huge white wedding gown and white high heels (bought at Payless Shoe Store for $12.99)..so, that morning we (me and my bridesmaids) moved everything that we had for the wedding in the garden over to the reception hall. Piece of cake. Another great suggestion is a public park that has a gazebo. Most of them are run by your city and are very happy to allow weddings there. I've seen some amazing public parks. Check with your local city or town hall, make sure you have all applicable permits, and pray for no rain. The cost in the park is usually from $0-$25. Not bad at all.
The photographer. Ahh, the bane of my existence. They few that we called wanted around $750. Well, no. I decided to involve everyone into the fun. I had something like 40 tables. I put 2 disposable cameras on each table and asked guests to please enjoy the use of them for the wedding so that we could capture our day through everyone's eyes. I got some really fantastic photos. I also got some really funny photos that I am hoping no one on this planet will ever see. It was so great. For about 2 months after I'd get at least 1 set of pictures per week and get to relive the experience all over again. I don't suggest using a digital camera. Someone at my wedding took what would have been great pictures but the battery was dying so they're blurry. Not worth it. I paid $3 each for a 24 exposure disposable camera..so, total cost of my photos was around $275. I did offer to pay everyone for the developing fees but not one person would take me up on it. So, I saved around $550 right there.
The DJ. Well, my experience was a little different and I can't offer too many tips. My brother's good friend is a DJ and my brother is an electrician. He had done some work for the DJ and in return, he worked my wedding for $50. Matter of fact, he wouldn't even take the $50. He did a great job, too. I say you look in your local paper and find ads from local DJ's looking for work. Most of them are more than willing to negotiate the price because they're trying to make a name for themselves. Remember to be fair though. Everyone is trying to make a living and save some money, there's no reason to be downright Scroogey.
The flowers were another challenge. One of my friends has a relative that owns a large chain florist shop. She offered to get me a discount. So, I went and talked to the man and he wanted huge money..well over $800 for my bouquet, flowers for the hall, my bridesmaids, both Mom's, buttonieres, etc. I couldn't imagine paying that much for flowers. So, I went to a smaller local florist. The bouquet I wanted was around $150 and had blue roses. Her and I discussed it and if I agreed to ditch the roses and go with carnations she's bring the price down to $45. Sold. For buttonieres, she sprayed a carnation for all the groomsmen and the groom (like the men cared) for $2 a piece, roses for our Mom's (no compromising there) and my bridesmaids really wanted to carry Calla Lillies. There weren't any available here then. We went to Michael's Crafts and they sold plastic calla lillies for $1.75 each. So, my bridesmaids got what they wanted, got to keep them as a keepsake, and I again got out of it relatively cheap.
The food was relatively inexpensive also. My entire family pitched in and made almost everything. We decided we'd do buffet style so people could help themselves. Go ahead, I dare anyone to tell me that you've been to a big fancy wedding where you're served chicken or prime rib and actually liked it. Yuck. Plastic tasting and it takes forever. I'm a pretty casual person and wanted everyone to be comfortable. So, we had meat platters and hot foods and finger sandwiches and everything else in between. I would say that to feed all 300 people (I didn't eat, I was a bag of nerves working the room) the cost was around $500. My favorite part was the platter on the end of the buffet with the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for the kids. There's nothing worse than spending $100 a plate only to hear your sweet niece say "dis is disGUSTing." Also, hungry children are overactive children. I wanted to make sure they were suitably fed if they didn't like the other 100 choices of foods.
Invitations can be expensive also. If you want that really heavy paper with all of the fancy writing you're going to pay top dollar. Instead, I went to a local printing company and for 200 invitations I think I paid $30..and I had found a 10% off coupon in my local newspaper. You can also check out Vista Print . They are always offering free this and free that if you just pay the shipping. Very reliable also. I order my business cards from them.
What's a wedding without a cake? Then again, what's any day of the week without a cake? I found the cake I always imagined..with a price I wouldn't pay on a bet. My mother-in-law to be had gone to Sam's Club for something and stopped in the bakery. She was talking about our wedding and one of the baker's mentioned that she did wedding cakes on the side. Sam's Club was well aware and even allowed her to advertise which surprised me. I met with her and showed her the cake I had wanted. She told me she could recreate it and instead of $1200 she would charge me $300. It was a very fair price. Check with local bakers first. People in your community are always willing to drop the price a little bit and hope it will drive more customers to them. I was very satisfied with my cake. I got a lot of compliments on it and people were impressed. Don't pay outrageous money for a cake. In 2 hours, after you've gotten it, it will be gone because someone ATE it.
Wedding favors. Don't go nuts with them. Be truthful to yourself. How many wedding favors have you gotten over the years that you still have? I don't even have one from my OWN wedding. I went to Michael's again, they have a 40% off coupon in every Sunday newspaper, and bought little clay pots. They looked like flower pots. We wrote on the outside in blue "Today I married my best friend. Kerry and Chris. June 3, 2001." Then we bought some of that netting and those really gross nuts that people give at weddings. Put the almonds in the netting, tied it with a blue ribbon ($1 a roll at Family Dollar), put it in the clay pot, and voila, 300 wedding souvenirs. The clay pots were .13 cents each, the toile (is that the right name?) was around $10, and the nuts..don't remember. They weren't cheap, but they weren't good either.
Ok, here is my best piece of wedding advice. Do not skimp on the videographer. I did and it is the ONLY regret I have about my wedding. My sister in law and one of my friends offered to video our wedding. I should've known better. She missed the high points, I heard her say "Oh MY, she's put on a few pounds, hasn't she) and the quality was poor. I don't care how much they want, pay them. You'll never regret it.
Did I cover everything? I think so. If not, and you want to know more, please feel free to leave me a comment and I'll answer your questions. Did you enjoy my wedding? I surely did. I didn't go broke, had enough money to go on the honeymoon of my dreams, and I remained debt free to do it. My best friend had a $50,000 wedding where only about 30 of us actually showed (it was in the midwest) and filed for divorce 2 weeks later. I don't think her parents are done paying off her wedding and this is going on 18 years. There's just no reason. If you want the whole Cinderella wedding, you'll pay for it. If you want the Cinderella wedding and you're willing to make a few compromises, you'll actually come out of it as a true Princess. Until next time...Happy Saving!